Perhaps today isnāt the day to write what I feel
Maybe I should give a shout-out to the men in my life that are wonderful fathers
Or acknowledge the importance of the celebration of Juneteenth
But instead
Tonight I feel sad and thatās all I want to put on this page
Tomorrow will bring a new day
But I know that a new day will not result in a āparentā choosing to accept you
Or congratulate you, or hell- even wish you the best
Tonight Iām sad because I believe she very actively, possibly subconsciously (but doubtful), hopes that I fail
All while publicly loving and admiring a few of her other (favorite) children all over Facebook
Maybe it shouldnāt bother me
I guess it hurts knowing Iāll continue this world without a mother figure
She was supposed to be āthe replacementā
She was supposed to fix me
But instead, sheās another woman that continues to break my heart and fails to love me the way a mother should
Or, I suppose, the way I believe a mother should love their daughter
I just imagine the future with my daughterā¦
And I know it involves tons of phone calls, adult cuddles and day dates, and one day⦠the involvement with her children should she ever have her ownā¦
I donāt know what a relationship with a woman is regarding these important memories a mother and daughter should share
But then again⦠how would I know what mothers and daughters should do???
Tonight Iām sad, thatās all